When an editor says, “Show, don’t tell,” what exactly does that mean? It’s more than a string of adjectives or details. Showing allows the author to tell the story through the action, words, thoughts, senses, and feelings of character’s. Perhaps this list of do’s and don’ts will clarify.
When an author “shows” s/he:
• makes description part of the action. Not: The floor was old. But: The worn floor creaked with each footstep on the warped boards.
• uses dialog to show description. Not: Sam was intimidating. But: Sam rammed his face close to John’s. “You’ll do what I tell you. You’ll do it now.”
• uses dialog to show emotion. Not: Mary was angry. But: Mary shouted, “Get away from me. You’re not worth my time.”
• uses action to show emotion. Not: Mary was sad. But: Tears streamed down Mary’s cheeks and her words caught in her throat.
When an author “tells” s/he:
• wanders off into lengthy expositions and digressions.
• explains and explains and explains.
• tells the reader what to think and feel.
• lists the facts and then announces the conclusion.
It takes more effort to create a word picture, but the effort can make the difference between a novel that sells and one that doesn’t.
More writing tips:
How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel?
How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story?
How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel
Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel
What is Literary Style?
What is Theme in Literature?
7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth
7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels
Developing Characters is No Mystery
Author’s Voice: How to find it?
Global Mysteries 
This is just the ‘medicine’ I need. Thanks.
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By: Loreen Lee on August 15, 2010
at 1:31 pm
Loreen, Your comments always encourage me to continue blogging. Thanks.
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By: nancycurteman on August 15, 2010
at 2:00 pm
Excellent, nancy!!!
I think this is my favorite writing post from you yet. Perfect comparisons between how NOT to do it and how to do it.
My favorite word picture:
Not: Mary was sad. But: Tears streamed down Mary’s cheeks and her words caught in her throat.
And thanks for including links to your other writing tips. I’m going to include a link to this post on FB for all my writing buddies.
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By: nrhatch on August 15, 2010
at 1:40 pm
Hey Nancy, Thanks for your comment and for including links to my blog on your Facebook.
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By: nancycurteman on August 15, 2010
at 1:59 pm
Whenever I see a new post from your blog, I rush to it. 🙂 Thank you for another pearl of wisdom to consider.
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By: Carol Ann Hoel on August 15, 2010
at 2:44 pm
I’m delighted that a fellow writer finds my blogs useful. Thanks for letting me know.
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By: nancycurteman on August 15, 2010
at 8:11 pm
It is good. I get so tired of hearing that phrase, but it is rare to see it defined so well. Thanks.
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By: deepercolors on August 15, 2010
at 3:21 pm
As always, I appreciate you.
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By: nancycurteman on August 15, 2010
at 8:12 pm
[…] When an editor says, “Show, don’t tell,” what exactly does that mean? It’s more than a string of adjectives or details. Showing allows the author to tell the story through the action, words, thoughts, senses, and feelings of character's. Perhaps this list of do’s and don’ts will clarify. When an author “shows” s/he: • makes description part of the action. Not: The floor was old. But: The worn floor creaked with each footstep on the warped boards. … Read More […]
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By: 4 Do’s and Don’ts of “Show, Don’t Tell” (via Global Mysteries) « My Literary Quest on August 16, 2010
at 6:01 am
[…] When an editor says, “Show, don’t tell,” what exactly does that mean? It’s more than a string of adjectives or details. Showing allows the author to tell the story through the action, words, thoughts, senses, and feelings of character's. Perhaps this list of do’s and don’ts will clarify. When an author “shows” s/he: • makes description part of the action. Not: The floor was old. But: The worn floor creaked with each footstep on the warped boards. … Read More […]
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By: Curteman on “Show, Don’t Tell” « joe clifford faust dot com on August 17, 2010
at 5:31 am
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by wolfshades, Nancy Curteman. Nancy Curteman said: 4 Do’s and Don’ts of “Show, Don’t Tell”: http://wp.me/pNbRC-dt […]
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By: Tweets that mention 4 Do’s and Don’ts of “Show, Don’t Tell” « Global Mysteries -- Topsy.com on August 17, 2010
at 5:51 am
Hi! As a new writer, this blog is invaluable! Thank you, some great advice already and I have only read a few lines. Saff. x
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By: sapphicscribe on August 17, 2010
at 6:09 am
[…] Ways to Create Tension in a Mystery Novel 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a […]
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By: What is Story Structure? « Global Mysteries on August 21, 2010
at 3:02 pm
[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story? How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel What is Literary Style? What is Theme in Literature? 7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth 7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels Developing Characters is No Mystery Author’s Voice: How to find it? […]
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By: How to Create Sympathetic Mystery Novel Character « Global Mysteries on August 23, 2010
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[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story? How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel What is Literary Style? What is Theme in Literature? 7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth 7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels Developing Characters is No Mystery Author’s Voice: How to find it? What is Story Structure? 9 Ways to Create Tension in a Mystery Novel Global Mysteries […]
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By: How to Write Character Arc in a Mystery Novel? « Global Mysteries on August 26, 2010
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[…] Ways to Create Tension in a Mystery Novel Global Mysteries 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a […]
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By: How to Edit a Mystery Novel « Global Mysteries on August 31, 2010
at 11:43 am
[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story? How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel What is Literary Style? What is Theme in Literature? 7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth 7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels Developing Characters is No Mystery Author’s Voice: How to find it? What is Story Structure? […]
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By: Global Mysteries on October 7, 2010
at 4:04 pm
[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story? How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel What is Literary Style? What is Theme in Literature? 7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth 7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels Developing Characters is No Mystery Author’s Voice: How to find it? What is Story Structure? […]
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By: 6 Ways to Avoid “Information Dumps” in a Mystery Novel « Global Mysteries on October 11, 2010
at 7:56 pm
[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story? How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel What is Literary Style? What is Theme in Literature? 7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth 7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels Developing Characters is No Mystery Author’s Voice: How to find it? What is Story Structure? […]
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By: How to Write a Mystery Novel Synopsis « Global Mysteries on October 28, 2010
at 4:22 pm
[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a Mystery Story? How to Create Minor Characters in Your Mystery Novel Pacing: A Critical Element in the Mystery Novel What is Literary Style? What is Theme in Literature? 7 Murder Weapons That Will Challenge The Cleverest Sleuth 7 Characteristics of Today’s Modern Mystery Novels Developing Characters is No Mystery Author’s Voice: How to find it? What is Story Structure? […]
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By: 10 Tips For Writing Backstory in a Mystery Novel « Global Mysteries on January 9, 2011
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[…] 10 things a Mystery Writer Should Know 9 Ways to Create Tension in a Mystery Novel 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a […]
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By: How to Tie Your Mystery Writing to Your Personal Passions « Global Mysteries on January 16, 2011
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[…] 10 things a Mystery Writer Should Know 9 Ways to Create Tension in a Mystery Novel 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” How Do Conflict and Crisis Differ in a Mystery Novel? How Important is Conflict in a […]
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By: 10 Ways to Increase Suspense in Your Mystery Novel « Global Mysteries on January 27, 2011
at 12:12 pm
[…] More Writing Tips: What is Story Structure? 6 Ways to Avoid “Information Dumps” in a Mystery Novel 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” […]
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By: 4 Killer Backstory Mistakes Mystery Authors Make « Global Mysteries on April 12, 2011
at 11:02 am
[…] Backstory: 10 things a Mystery Writer Should Know 9 Ways to Create Tension in a Mystery Novel 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” […]
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By: Questions to Ask Before Adding Details to Your Mystery Novel « Global Mysteries on April 25, 2011
at 8:20 pm
[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” […]
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By: Don’t Interrupt Your Mystery Novel Reader « Global Mysteries on September 1, 2011
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[…] 4 Do’s and Don’ts of ”Show, Don’t Tell.” […]
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By: STEFAN VUCAK – Award Winning Author 7 Story Structure Weaknesses that Collapse your Mystery Novel » STEFAN VUCAK - Award Winning Author on May 21, 2013
at 1:16 am